10/24/2008 Baptism and Heaven

Lacie’s best friend Ava’s mom got baptized last night. Our church celebrated 3 baptisms. AND since we are a church plant and meet at a local middle school and had no baptism facilities, we utilized the pool of a local hotel. After the baptisms, we had a huge chili supper and enjoyed our new friends/family from our church. I talked to Lacie about Kristie getting baptized. I told her that people get baptized when they ask Jesus to come and live in their hearts. Somehow the conversation let to my saying that “then we get to go to heaven.”

She said, “I do not want to go to heaven.” AND then she said, “I do not want you to go to heaven. I do not want you to leave me. If you go to heaven, who will be with me?” That kind of broke my heart.

Ahhh my sweet angel, there is so much for her to understand – and not understand. I do not want her to be scared of heaven – but I understand her fears. I remember feeling afraid of losing my mom with I was a little girl. Heck, I am afraid of losing my mom now. Anyway –

Right during the time of the baptisms, Lacie said – “I want to be baptized.” And I told her that only people who ask Jesus into their heart can be baptized. Then she said, I want my mommy to be baptized. I told her I had already been baptized and that I did not need to do it again. So, maybe witnessing Kristie getting baptized and seeing that she has still not gone to heaven - she realized that we just do not “leave” when baptized.

Oh, if anyone has recommendations on books for this topic and for 4 year olds – please share.

I have been wanting to share this pic for over a month now. I think I mentioned we had a busy October? Here is a picture of some of Lacie’s friends from her China play group. They are just all too precious. Can you tell which one is Lacie?

OK, since they do tend to favor each other, I will share: Lacie is the one on the bottom row, far left.

Blessings!

11/23/2008 Our October in review

We had such a busy month in October. There are even events not included in this, like Lacie's birthday - I still need to put something else together for that. Anyway - here is our October - and this does not do it justice to even begin to explain how busy our month was.

Love to all!

11/21/2008 More Lacie-isms

Lacie has been full of it lately – full of what I call “Lacie-isms.”

1. During dinner I often ask Euitag about life in Korea and/or life with his family. Tonight I asked him if people lived with their parents in Korea until they got married. Lacie heard this conversation and said, “Married? Married? Boys don’t get married!” I told her that boys do get married. “who do you think the girls marry?” AND I told her that daddy married mommy and daddy is a boy. She said, “oh.”

2. We are getting together with our china friends (Lacie’s play group) and also the international adoption father/son playgroup to play at the same place tomorrow. I told her that her friend Noah and his new brother Mikah were going to be there. Lacie said, Mikah? I said yes, remember Noah has a baby brother who just came home from China. (Mikah has albinism). Lacie said, “mommy he can’t be from China.” I said, “why?” fully expecting to hear, “because he is white.” But instead she said, “because, he is a boy.” Ahhhhh – oh my dear daughter – she thinks only girls come from China.

3. Paul has a tendency when he gets mad to throw himself back and knock his head on whatever is behind him. If he does it to a person and gets their head we call it “head butting.” Since we are still co-sleeping, sometimes in the middle of the night I wake up to him “head butting” me. It is a very rude awakening – it hurts pretty bad. I was sharing the story with John in front of Lacie and when I said that Paul “head butted me,” she responded with “Ewwwww YUK! I think she thought Paul was putting his “butt” on my head.

4. Lately she has been real curious as to where she and Paul have come from – and I do not mean China or Korea. But she has on two separate occasions informed me that either she or her brother came from my belly. I keep reminding her that they both have a birth mom and they came from her belly. God brought mommy and daddy to China and Korea to adopt Lacie and Paul so we could all be a forever family. So, tonight I was a bit surprised when Lacie asked me while reading a story about baby Jesus – how he got out of his mommy’s belly. “how did he get out of her belly mommy?” I just told her that God made a special place and we would talk about that another day.

Our Thanksgiving holiday is coming up. We have so much to be thankful for.

11/17/2008 Adoption Finalization scheduled

Ahhhhh in almost two weeks, our adoption of Paul will be final. China and Korea are very different. With Lacie our adoption was final in China, and her name was officially changed there and she became a U.S. citizen the day we arrived back in the U.S. WE did not have to do a readoption in state court.

With Paul, it has not been final. I do not know when it was final for Korea, but for the U.S. and state laws - it has not been final and we had to have three follow up home study visits, and then petition to adopt him in state court. That was filed last week and the agencies have worked in a timely manner to get the homestudies written, approved and a court report written and filed. We have hired an experienced adoption attorney who knows the courts, system and judges and guardian ad litems. Since I work with attorneys I thought I would save money and utilize one of my awesome attorneys but with the end of the year approaching we thought it best to go with someone who knows the ins and outs - and since we do not have time for mistakes. I do not mind mistakes, but we do not have time for them.

Anyway, we are overjoyed to announce that he is going to be OURS officially, legally and all the other 'ly's there are. He has definitely been OURS in our hearts and minds since 3/31/08 but it will feel good to get it all finalized. We have so much to be thankful this season - two beautiful children and so much more.



If anyone in the family or any of our dear friends are interested in being with us on our adoption finalization day - let us know. Details won't be posted here of course.

Blessings to all -- for we are truly blessed!

Vonda

Time Outs

Our primary form of discipline is time outs. To this day Lacie does not do them well. I have gotten to the point that I have to just put her in the chair, and walk away. If she gets up than I have to ignore her. If not, than it becomes a very exhausting wrestling match as I try to get her back into time out. She is a strong little bug - that if for sure. One day a few weeks ago she was not staying in time out so I just shut the gate that separates the kitchen from the family room. John and Euitag were in the family room and I went in the back of the house to do something. I kept hearing Euitag and John laugh harder and harder. I thought they were laughing because Paul did something funny. When I entered the room, this is what I saw:

Lacie hanging on the gate. She knew that she should not come over it so she just hung on it crying, "get me out of here." Well, while it looks pitiful - she even laughs about it now.

Paul on the other hand takes time out like a true man. His offenses are when he hits Lacie out of anger. If he gets mad at anything, he hits. He hits me, Lacie, the dog, the couch - etc. If I am fast enough I will grab his hands gently and tell him "no hit." That is typically enough to stop the impulse. But - sometimes I am not fast enough. So, then he has to go to time out. He only has to sit there a minute. That is long enough for a little guy. Then he has to go say he is sorry to the person or thing he hit. He is so sweet. Since his only spoken word is still Mamma, he will walk over to Lacie and just put his sweet little arms around her and hug her. That is acceptable to me.
Here is Paul in time out:

Amazing the difference, huh? Time out is effective for Paul - it gives him a moment to distract and then he is over his temper. I think hitting is a normal toddler response to things - I hope he grows out of it soon though. We were so spoiled with Lacie. She never hit, bit, kicked, or did anything aggressive. (ok she bit my mom once, but it was not out of meanness - it was just a love bite I think.)

Have a good weekend - we will be very busy. More to blog about - if I can ever get caught up.

Vonda

11/4/2008 Growing up

My sweet four year old had her annual check up/physical today. This was the very first time she did not kick, fight, scream and argue with me about going or during her examination. She has grown up so much in the last six months. I was not surprised when she accepted the fact that she was going to see the doctor. She asked if they were going to put a "stick in her throat." This after having several rounds of strep well over a year ago.

Then she was so big to get on the scales by herself for her height and weight. She is still at 25% for both. She walked by herself into the examination room. She announced to the nurse, "I am going to be very good. I am coming to the doctor today so I don't get sick. Just like I go to the dentist to keep my teeth well." (Ok - she has preventative medicine down). She asked the nurse, "you won't put a stick in my throat, right?"

Then the doctor came in. We love her. She spends quality time with the moms and dads. She talked to Lacie too - recommending more milk, etc. Lacie checked out very healthy (as expected) and let the doctor look at her - ears and all. I told the doctor that I had yet to tell Lacie about getting her 4 year immunizations. Not only did she need 4 shots, but she also needed to pee in a cup, get her finger pricked for labs and get the flu mist squirted up her nose. About that time she looked at the doctor and said, "I love you Doctor R. I like coming to the doctor." EEEKKKKK! That is about the time Dr. R told her that she was going to get five "owies" in her arms and legs and that it is to help her stay well so she does not have to come back to the doctor. Lacie said, "OTay" with enthusiasm. (mommy was beginning to feel REAL guilty.)

She first received the flu mist and she was so so brave for she hates even saline spray during a cold. Then the nurse prep'd her finger for the prick - she took a deep breath as instructed and was stunned to see her finger dripping blood. But she was so interested in the collection of the blood that she did not seem phased - and then said - "I am being very brave. I am being a good girl."

THEN IT WAS TIME - time for the shots. The first shot went well. Lacie seemed stunned but took it very well. Shot 2 made her whimper and shot 3 hit her REAL hard. She began to cry - it did hurt for sure. As she cried she said, "I don't like this doctor anymore. I don't want to come here again." Don't you know I really felt bad then. She got her last shot in her leg - she cried the whole time. She then witnessed my flu shot and asked me why I did not cry. She told me I was so brave. That is when I told her over and over again how brave she was, how good she was and that mommy was so proud of her for being a big girl. I have told her over and over and over again all day long. My girl is growing up! It is bittersweet.

Here she is:


And here is one of the boy - I can't leave him out of the photos -


Blessings

Vonda

11/ 4/ 2008 - I knew he would be a gentleman

The man I voted for today is not president elect. However, his concession speech is exactly what I expected - very kind, respectful and honorable. Otherwise, I am not in a place to share anymore feelings on this at this time.

GOD bless America!